Life seems to be a collection of unique experiences. These experiences can exist mostly in the real world, or they can exist in an abstract or imaginary world. When doing something like cutting down trees or soldering a circuit, I consider that to be completely concentrated on the real world. You are extremely focused on one “real” thing, on which you have a unique perspective. One person may see a tree with a thin slice in it, while you may see a strategy well or poorly implemented. One person may see a seemingly random organization of melted metal, while you see an abstract circuit design.
But when I am in the real world with sensory stimulation that requires little to no concentration, sometimes I can feel like I am completely in a different world. If I am sitting on a couch listening to good music with nothing else in the room to grab my attention, I can be in a completely different fantasy world in my head. A passer-by will see a guy sitting on a couch nodding his head while staring at the floor.
There are also other situations in which you can feel almost completely removed from reality. One such situation for me is when I am hacking. I am completely concentrated on my command prompt or other related interface. My virtual sense of where I am almost overtakes my other senses. My sense of sight is little more than a tool to transfer information from this other experience to the real-world experience.
In essence, I sometimes have the feeling that I am in more than one place, or experience if we’d like to use the popular word of this moment, in a given day. My experience hacking can be completely separated from my sensory overload in the real world that is a walk down a city street.
Why is it such a social no-no to take off your belt in public?
For a while, I have been trying to get into chatting on IRC. Let’s just say it’s not working too well so far. My main problem with it is that you can literally have a chat room with 100 people in it, and NO ONE will be chatting. What the hell is the point in this?
Anyway, so last night I went into the #freebsd room on the irc.freenode.net server. I asked a question “Is anyone in here familiar using snort?” I got a response “I prefer to use a tissue.” OK, funny enough. But I wanted to assure them that I actually had a question. So I said “No, seriously, I am trying to educate myself on security tools. Should I be starting with tcpdump?” Then, the conversation proceeded to play off of the “dump” part of my question. I never did receive a response, not even a “I think you’re asking that question in the wrong room.”
Why are people in the tech community so often hesitant to be helpful? I find this lack of cooperation to be extremely frustrating. I believe it is also quite harmful to the community.
Something I have noticed about myself has given me an idea about an alternate form of education. What if you were given a large amount of resources such as access to books, classes, professors, and TAs and you were judged on your worthiness for a degree at a point of your and your adviser’s determining? So basically, you would decide what to study at all times. You could go to a lecture for two weeks, get what you want from it, and put what you have learned towards something else. You could do independent research and learning, and possibly go to professors and TAs to help you understand something or to guide you in the right direction.
I find that I learn best when I find something that sounds interesting and just see where it takes me. A lot of times I will find myself holding back on learning something that I want to learn because I know I have “classwork” to do. And the classwork is not particularly interesting so a one-hour assignment might take me four hours since I am constantly procrastinating. I am sure this idea has a lot of flaws, but I am just throwing it out there.
I remember the good old highschool days. I remember relishing in the fact that I was happy almost all the time. Life was good (for a time). What has happened since then? I have turned into a person that struggles daily with a quest to acheive happiness.
I think there are several contributing factors. But, the scary thing is that I only think I know how to help myself. I have to test out my hypothesis to know for sure. Welcome to the experiment called my life.
Well at least it is slow here at work tonight, as it should be. I don’t think most people are busy fucking with their servers on a Friday night. And life is good at least at this moment. I’ve got my favorite DJ playing on my new headphones, and I’ve got it broadcasting on my radio station, which no one besides my cousin Mark listens to. But that is fine by me. It is fun even having only one person besides myself enjoy my music.
That brings me to the next subject. I have recently found a program called psycle that lets you create electronic music. I guess one might call it a synthesizer. (Sorry for my lack of music knowledge, I have almost no real educational experience in music.) It seems complex to get good at, but easy to at least get started with.
So the night begins . . .
So I got tired of waiting for myself to write the custom blog software I had always meant to write. Well I did start on it and get a decent amount of code written at one point. But it was in CGI and, being the perfectionist that I am, I had decided that I was going to rewrite the whole thing in PHP. I had seen wordpress in action a couple of times, and it looked pretty nice. So, as you can see, I went ahead and downloaded it and installed it. At first, I was thinking “This is really nice, but there are still some basic features I want to implement, like nested categories.” Well, they done implemented them.
So now I figure that since wordpress is released under the GPL, maybe I can just help out and add/improve features on this software.
I suppose that’s all for now.